Remembering

I had to work all of Memorial Day weekend, therefore I did not get to attend any of the local ceremony's at the cemeteries.  And because we don't have a TV that works (only for DVD's and VHS use) I couldn't even watch the Memorial Day Concert on PBS.

Mom, dad and I went to cemetery over the weekend and walked around.  I stood there and looked at all the flags, standing watch by the tombstones of those who stood for my freedom and liberty by serving this country. There were so many flags.  And to think that this was just one cemetery of thousands . . . "How many people does it take to protect a country?" I asked dad.

I read this article at work on Monday.  The picture of 19 year old Army Pfc. Kevin is what grabbed my attention.  He's only 19 years old and has lost both legs and an arm.  He looks so young.

What does his life hold for him?  He most likely will have a very challenging time getting a job, because of his disability. Why should employers not give him the job when he voluntarily offered his life, for that employer's freedom?!

US military in action 2010

2010

I attended a Civil War reenactment with my unit two weekends ago.  I had been looking forward to it, but when I got there, I didn't enjoy it like I thought I would.  The men went out and shot at each other; the cannons went off, the crowd cheered at seeing the smoke rings from the cannons. I sat there watching the battle, wondering if this was how the towns people felt when they left to watch the first battle of Bull Run.

I could not help but sit there and wonder how we had come so far from what our real reaction would be to see men fighting and dying.  Why do we think of re-living a horrible war as 'fun'?  Back then, you would cringe to hear a cannon go off, because the dirt around you would be descending on you as your messmate friend is blown off his feet, never to walk again due to one or both of his legs being blown off, or worse.

"Would the real men from the Civil War be pleased to know we are honoring them by pretending to kill each other?"  I wondered.  I thought about that all weekend and came away with an answer:  No.  I don't think they would be pleased to be honored in this way.  Yes, they would be glad that we are not forgetting them. But there has to be a different way to remember them than re-living such horrible battle scenes.  We re-live the battles, but we (reenactors) don't take the battles seriously.  Yes, the commanders take things seriously, but not all the soldiers do.  When someone takes a hit, their fellow soldiers stand over them in the ranks and laugh at how 'pretty' he looks, laying there in the grass.  (I use to portray Sarah E. Edmonds who disguised

herself as Franklin Thompson and was a soldier, nurse and spy.  That's how I know a little bit of what takes place when seeing 'the elephant'. )

Conner Prairie 2012

This Memorial Day has stirred me into wanting to honor our fallen soldiers.  But honestly, I'm not sure how to go about doing it.  Mom suggested I check into the Daughters of Union Veterans, due to my diminishing passion to see Civil War reenactment battles.  Don't get me wrong - I will be the first to admit how much I love to see the brothers in arms stand and face each other, sending volley after volley of black powder into the air! (Although there are times when I mentally tell them to dress the line, or start taking hits, or advice the ice angels to start giving aid to the men.)

Conner Prairie 2012

But after this Memorial Day, I have changed.  I no longer care to honor our fallen military personnel in the way that I have.

I have not yet thought of how to honor the military people who gave so much . . . but I will think of something. Even if it means personally visiting as many cemeteries as I can. 

Morgan's Raid bridge, Conner Prairie 2012

Welcome Home

My sister, her husband and their daughter are finally back in the good old USA after living in Panama for about five months.  They spent two days with us before heading north. 

We all had a good time catching up on a variety of things, before the little family of three departed to visit Daniel's family, over three hours north of us.  It is so nice knowing my sister is back in the states! 

Verse of the week:

"For if their purpose or activity is of human origin, it will fail.  But if it is from God, you will not be able to stop these men; you will only find yourselves fighting against God." 

Acts 5:38b - 39

Easter Surprise

Two years ago I was in collage, down in WV and even though ABC is a Christian collage, we did not get an Easter brake.  The Thursday before Easter weekend, I got a note in my mailbox, from a "Secret male admirer" saying he wanted to take me out to dinner that evening.  I quickly showed the note to my roommate who was with me.  "Who do you think it is?" Julie asked.  "I don't know!  None of the guys seem interested in me . . . Who could it be?!  What do I do?!"  We went to lunch and watched the male students as they came and went, wondering which one was my admirer.

I was antsy all day.  I pondered and stewed over what I should wear.  My mind was running a mile a minute; what would mom and dad say about this?  What if I didn't like the "Secret male admirer"?  Part of me was excited, but the other part just wanted the 'date' to be over with.

I finally stopped changing my mind about what to wear, got ready and headed to the front porch of Des Plains to wait.  I slowly walked by the the lounge room to see who all was there and if any male might 'light up' at seeing me.  Alicia from across the hall and Sara from upstairs were close at hand because they were just as anxious to find out who the guy was that had " . . .gone to great lengths to make this evening special . . ."  I glanced at the parking lot full of vehicles in front of the girls dorm and noticed a van that looked just like my parents van.  I moved so I could see the license plate.  Gasp!  It was not a WV license plate!  Could it be? . . . But how? . . . Is it? . . . He wouldn't . . .  I started running down the steps.  Alicia and Sara (Julie had to work) came running after me: "Tiffany! Wait!  Come back!  Where are you going?  Tiffany . . . !"
I ran around the side of the van, opened the driver's door and embraced my dad.  "Tiffany?"  I looked up to see Alicia and Sara at the front of the van looking very puzzled.  "It's my dad!" I said with happy tears rolling down my cheeks.

My dad had driven over three hundred miles to see me and spend Easter weekend with me.   

Badcock state park

We had a wonderful weekend together, which ended all too soon.  Dad got to sit in on some of my classes, helped me work on papers and attend church with me on Sunday.  We went to Badcock State park on Saturday and Hawks Nest state park on Sunday afternoon.  

WV mountains

2010

I was so grateful he surprised me! It meant a lot to me.

Verse of the week:

"Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long."

Psalm 25:5-6

The Irish Rosette

St. Patrick's day sneaked up on me this year.  I'm not one of those people who loves to 'party' and celebrate the day, but due to my Scotch/Irish heritage, I do like to wear green for the day.  I was scheduled to work on St. Patrick's and that meant having to wear my chef's outfit. 

This is a chef's uniform:

I have to wear black pants and a black apron.  If you have noticed, there is no green associated with this chef's clothing color scheme.  So I decided to make a little Irish Rosette to pin on my apron. 

It went together quite well and was easy to hand stitch. 

Not the best picture . . . camera was not focused right.

I used a spare button from my Civil War stash.  It was about the only one I could find that was the right size and had 'the' look I was hunting for.  I am rather pleased with how the rosette turned out.  It looked nice against a black apron.

Verse of the week:

"I will praise you, O Lord, with all my heart. I will tell of all your wonders.  I will be glad and rejoice in you; I will sing praise to you name, O Most High."

Psalm 9:1 & 2 

Then God Intervened

Our time in Panama (see previous post) ended all too soon, the only reason I was ready to come home was because I found a scorpion the day we were to leave.

Kristin and I left Boquete by taxi around 10 p.m. and went to the David bus stop, where we got on a double decker bus and headed to Panama City at midnight.  We arrived in Panama City around 6 a.m.  I had never seen a bus stop so large!  And as early as it was in the morning, it was busy!  We both needed to use the powder room, but could we find one where you did not have to use a scan card to get in? No.   We got something to eat at a bread store (it smells wonderful in there!) and did a lot of walking.  Kristin wanted to see the Panama Canal up close and in person because her great uncle helped make/dig it.  We thought the bus stop was fairly close to the Canal, so after breakfast, we headed out (on foot) to find it.  We felt like we were swimming up stream due to the large number of people heading to the bus stop. We walked for a little bit and came to a four lane highway that would need to be crossed.  We stopped and looked at each other.  I didn't want to feel like a bug under a microscope walking in front of all those vehicles.  We decided not to cross, so we headed back to the bus stop in hopes of finding a map.  We could not find a map.
We could not even find someone who spoke the slightest little bit of English in hopes of helping us.  We were at a stand still and were considering just going to the airport and forgetting the Canal all together.

 And then God intervened. 

A couple (looked like they were in their forties) walked up.  "Do you need a translator? I speak English, can I help you?" the man asked.  Kristin and I could hardly believe our ears.  "Yes!  Yes, we do need help!"  Between Kristin and me, we explained that we wanted to see the Canal, but we had to be at the airport by noon.  We followed the couple to a taxi, where the man told the driver where to take us.  Then the man (I'll call him Gabriel) turned to Kristin and me.  "He will take you to the Canal and bring you back for a total of $15. "  We thanked the couple from the bottom of our hearts and crawled in the little yellow taxi.  We pulled into the Panama Canal visitor's center around 7:30 a.m.  The gate man waved us over.  In English he informed us that the center did not open until 10:30.  Kristin explained that we just wanted to see the Canal, and were not interested in all the visitors information.  The kind gate man told/explained to our driver and off we went to a different place down the road a bit.  Kristin and I got out, took some pictures, told each other "We're really here!  We're at the Panama Canal!"

When we decided we had enough pictures, we hopped back in the taxi, and our none-English-speaking-driver took us back to the bus stop.  We thanked him over and over before we parted ways.
Kristin and I decided we were ready to head to the airport, so we got in line to buy a bus ticket.  I am so glad we took a bus through town; we had taken a plane on our way down, which was neat but I was glad to be able to see the buildings and town people up close.
The flight from Panama City to Houston went well.  But as we neared the Houston airport, I was anxiously watching the clock.  From the time the plane we were on landed, we had one hour to go through customs, security, check our luggage back in, and find the gate for our last flight to Detroit. 
Let me interject here and tell you a little bit about my personality: I don't like to be late.  And I don't like to cut things close.  I live by the motto 'To be early is to be on time, to be on time is to be late.' So with each tick - tock of the the clock hands, my heart started beating faster. 

As Kristin and I stood in line for customs, I anxiously calmly turned to Kristin and posed the question "I think we should have a game plan in case we miss our flight."  Before she had time to answer, the man in front of us turned and looked at us.  "When does your flight leave?  . . . Who are you flying with?" After we answered the gentleman's questions, he informed us that "That is Continental's last flight out for the night.  They won't fly again until tomorrow."  Kristin and I looked at each other.  Being the humans that we are, we both wanted to panic.

Then God intervened.

"What time does your flight leave?" the man in front of us asked again.  We answered and he immediately ushered us in front of himself.  We made it through customs, and walked as fast as our legs could go to the next stop.  Somewhere along the line, Kristin and I got separated; it was after we were (again) ushered to the front of the line because God had (again) placed the man mentioned above, to be next in line. But for some reason he turned around and saw Kristin and me running to stay on time.  "Come on! Jump ahead!  I hope you make it, good luck!" He said as he waved us ahead of the others in line.  Kristin went one way and I started to follow but the airport lady said I was to go a different way ". . . you'll meet her on the other side."  I rushed through the doors, but Kristin was nowhere to be seen.  I said a quiet prayer for Kristin to make it, as I hurried on to security.  I ran through the airport to gate E6 and breathlessly asked the two ladies "Is . . . this plane . . . going to Detroit?"  "It was but it's been moved to gate E16.  We've announced it, sorry. . ."  I turned just as Kristin came running up. I relayed the news and we both broke out on the run again.  People looked at us a little funny like . . . I tried not to let that bother me . . . we were in an airport, right?  People run in airports . . . right?  Or is it just the movies?  Thank goodness for flat escalators!  We took full advantage of them, as we ran.
At last we made it to gate E16.  "You're just in time!" the ladies at the desk said.  We ran down the tram; "We haven't closed the door yet." the stewardess said as we slowed our pace.  We found our sets and collapsed in exhaustion and relief. The rest of the flight went fine; mom picked us up and we made it home in the early morning hours.
Kristin and I had a wonderful time in Panama with Janel and her family, but to be honest, I think the event that will be first in my mind when I think of our trip is when God intervened and placed 'angels' in our path.
A final word to that kind gentleman in the airport:  yes, we made it home. And thank you again!  May the Lord bless you richly for your small act of kindness that got us to our flight just. in. time!

Verse of the week:

"Not to us, O LORD not to us but to your name be the glory, because of your love and faithfulness."

Psalm 115:1

To Panama We Went

My friend Kristin and I had a wonderful time in Panama with my sister, her husband and their little girl!  Kristin and I kept telling/reminding each other throughout our seven day stay that "We're in Panama! We're really doing this!"  (Not that I had ever wanted to go to Panama; if it weren't for Janel being there, I would never have gone.)  I think we reminded each other because we were excited and couldn't believe we were in a country we had never dreamed of visiting.

So without further ado, here are some pictures of the wonderful time we had! 

First time I saw the sun set from the sky; pictures do not do justice!

The town of Boquete

Kristin and me.

Shopping

Sidewalk made with broken tile pieces.

I loved this sidewalk, it reminded me that the Lord can make something beautiful with broken pieces.

We went hiking and swimming for my sister's 25th birthday.  

Natasha fell asleep on the way home, from such a full day. I carried her in and she woke up. (Yes, I got sun/wind burned on my arms, neck and the back of my legs. It was about six days until I could put a shirt on without clenching my jaw.)

Volcano mountain in background.

If you hop over to my sister's wordpress, you can see more pictures of our adventures.
I enjoyed visiting Daniel, Janel and Natasha very much!  It was hard to come home. 
Kristin and I have a wonderful story to tell about God's faithfulness on our way home, but I will save that for the next post.

Verse of the week: Isaiah 43:4

"Since you are precious and honored in my sight, and because I love you, I will give men in exchange for you, and people in exchange for your life."

I don't fully understand the later part of this verse; I'm memorizing it for the first part because I need to remind myself that my Father loves me, and I am precious to Him.

Last weeks verse: Psalm 27:1

"The LORD is my light and my salvation - whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life - of whom shall I be afraid?"

 What the stronghold of my life?

Grown Up Dreams

I may be over eighteen, but to be honest, my dreams have not changed much from when I was young.  When I was little, riding in the van with mom and Janel, we'd drive by old run-down homes.  I would say "I'm going to fix up that house and fill it with orphans."  It was not until last year that I realized (after all these years) that I had a love for historical architecture, in addition to a heart for orphans (which I've known about for years.)
I would love to have a home where I can house parent-less children and love them, be there for them, and help them grow.  My passion and desire for them is stronger than the desire to have a child of my own.  I would like to go on a short term missions trip to work with orphans, but at the same time I don't.  Here is why:  I don't want to be just one more person floating through an orphan's life.  I don't want to attach myself to a little child, who melts my heart and then have to leave.  "You have to stay here, while I go home to my parents." kind of thing.  Yes, volunteering on a missions trip is important, but I believe orphans are insecure to begin with and they just want someone to love them.  They are probably used to people/workers coming and going, so they most likely try to stop letting themselves become attached to people, because they are of the mindset that in a few days, you will walk out of their life, like all the other people before you.  I don't want to be that kind of person that walks into their life, and then walks out because 'my time is up'.  No, I dream of having a home where they can live with me and I can be a 'parent' to them as they wait for a loving family to adopt them.  I want to give them love and security while they wait for that lovely family that will be forever theirs.

'My' old house, I've loved it every since I can remember.

I still long to restore an old home.  I would love to research what kind of furnishings, floor coverings, and wall painting/papering would be authentic to the original building of the house.  I hope I get to restore at least one old home to it's former glory, before I die.

I would love to live in a federal style house, like president Lincoln's home in Springfield IL!

Another one of my dreams that has stuck with me for a handfull of years, is to support the military who protect our country.  Yes, I can write letters, send care boxes and collect cell phones for them, but that's not what my dream is.  I'd rather be there to comfort them in the hospitals and on the field, help them write letters home and speak words of encouragement to them.  Not in a romantic way, but a motherly way. I saw the picture below in a local newspaper a few months back and something inside of me said "I want to do that. I want to comfort them."

"The only thing I could do at that moment was hug the guy. . . "
Sgt. Maj. Bryan Pacholiski said.

I have looked for a picture taken from the movie Pearl Harbor of the scene that captivates me; when Rafe and Danny are holding hands with the soldiers trapped in the ship, but it seems no one has taken a still shot of that scene.  When I saw that, again, something inside me said "I want to do that too."

I don't know if it's in the Lord's plan for me to physically be there to comfort soldiers, or when they just need a hug or someone to hold their hand.  So for the time being, I will continue to pray for them and write letters.

One night after telling my desires/dreams to mom and dad, mom suggested I look up what my spiritual gift(s) are.  They turned out to be mercy and compassion.  

Verse of the week:  Isaiah 26:3-4

"You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD is the Rock eternal."

Last weeks verse:  Isaiah 46:4

"Even to your old age and gray hairs, I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you."

I have chosen these verses for this week because a friend and I fly out on Tuesday to visit my sister and her family in Panama for seven days.  Flying is not my cup of tea, even though ginger root does work wonders (praise the Lord for that!).